‘Pirates’ buries its loot

27018652

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl
PG-13
Playing at area theaters
Two reels out of four

Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl is the second movie in two years to take its inspiration from a Disney Land/Disney World ride. The first was The Country Bears, which was not as bad as I thought it would be. Following the example of its sister ride, Pirates of the Caribbean is much better than it probably has a right to be.

An unlikely combination of swashbuckler and old-fashioned horror movie, the movie is quite charming in spots. However, it is eventually sent plunging to Davy Jones’ locker as a result of sensory overload and an obnoxious, pounding score that sounds like it came from a modern action movie.

Aboard the Black Pearl, infamous pirate Capt. Barbossa (Geoffrey Rush) attacks the city of Port Royal and kidnaps a governor’s daughter, Elizabeth (Keira Knightley). Barbossa then sets sail with his hostage toward a secret hideaway, hoping to lift an ancient curse by sacrificing her and returning a once-plundered treasure.

Elizabeth’s childhood friend, Will Turner (Orlando Bloom), enlists an eccentric seaman, Capt. Jack Sparrow (Johnny Depp), to chase after the cursed buccaneer. Close on their heels is the British military led by Elizabeth’s ardent suitor, Commodore Norrington (Jack Davenport), and her father (Jonathan Pryce).

Any hopes that Pirates of the Caribbean would be a classic old-school swashbuckler were dashed when I discovered Jerry Bruckheimer’s name in the producer credits. Swashbucklers take a certain amount of élan, something that is too much to expect from the man (with late partner Don Simpson) known for such subtle fare as Top Gun, The Rock and Armageddon.

Pirates of the Caribbean hammers you over the head with pulsating music and excessive imagery in case you didn’t get the point. This is filmmaking for people who would rather see a movie than read a book. Not that they would know where to find one.

But the frustrating thing is the film actually starts out quite promising. The opening scene is almost flawless, introducing almost every element of the story. When the movie is at its best, it almost resembles a cross between Masterpiece Theatre and one of those Disney live-action adventure movies from the 1960s. The acting is actually quite excellent, with Depp delivering an absolutely riveting and funny performance as the smarter-than-he-looks Jack Sparrow. The elegant, talented Knightley has a bit of the young Kate Hepburn and will no doubt turn up in better movies.

One wishes that Bruckheimer had stayed home for this one. Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl could have benefited from a more delicate touch than his. Instead, it has the effect of having a scabbard being brought down on your head at full strength.


Shanghai Knights
PG-13
Available Tuesday

The follow-up to the surprise hit Shanghai Noon (2000), Shanghai Knights offers more of the same. This time Chon Wang (Jackie Chan) and Roy O’Bannon (Owen Wilson) must travel across the pond to retrieve the Imperial Seal and to avenge the death of Wang’s father. While in England, the duo encounters myriad adventures, including meeting Arthur Conan Doyle and a very young Charlie Chaplin. The movie is full of sly in-jokes and broad humor. Wilson and Chan continue their unlikely but charming rapport from Shanghai Noon.