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Numbers seem to encapsulate Tom DeFelice. The 64-year-old head football coach at Bok Technical High School, 1901 S. Ninth St., has, with his baseball background included, given his insights to young men for 52 seasons. In 18 seasons leading the Wildcats’ varsity football program, he amassed 129 victories, including 43 straight Public League regular season triumphs — a streak that came to an end in a Sept. 18 loss to Imhotep Charter; 14 winning campaigns; 13 regular season division titles; and nine playoff victories.
Impressive indeed, those figures cannot top four, the number of grandchildren the former Bella Vista resident will have by next year. His increasing descendants have started DeFelice’s retirement countdown, which will hit zero in June when he will end his professional affiliation with the Passyunk Square institution.
“My family and I had been entertaining the idea for a couple years. My decision has nothing to do with a decrease in my passion for coaching or educating,” DeFelice said of his tenure, which has included a stint as the school’s head of health and physical education. “It is also not about winning or losing.”
Losses were rarities under DeFelice, who led the junior varsity team until 1993, when he took over for Charlie Guida. His varsity squads suffered just 50 setbacks, with one tie, in 180 games and only eight over the last five seasons.
“Success comes from within,” DeFelice said of his sideline success. "… Despite our hard work, some of our opponents thought, when I came here, that Bok was a laughingstock."
The varsity players failed to register a winning season from 1954 through ’79. Under DeFelice, however, they finished with four losing seasons but only one in the last 13 years.
“We began turning the barrel as a program in 1980,” he noted. “In my time as head coach, I took great joy in looking at raw ability and molding it.”
“I received both as a young man, and I came to know what I wanted to do in life,” DeFelice said. “Discipline and punishment are two words that are missing from our society.”
Their lack leaves children who covet direction and structure, DeFelice said. He became a teacher to provide ample supplies of both.
“I enjoy being with young people. I feel fortunate to have had an opportunity to spend so much time in education,” he said.
He also applauds every soul willing to be a teacher. To punctuate his admiration, he discussed talks he often has with parents.
“I ask them how many kids they have and if they ever take them to the zoo. When they say they have two or three and that they do go, I ask them how they feel when they are done.
“They tell me, ‘Oh, I’m exhausted.’ Well, teachers work with 32 students every 47 minutes. They have to be parents every day,” he said.
Father to three, DeFelice and wife Grace reside in Glen Mills.
“I’ve known and loved her since we were 15,”he said.
Reaching maturity at West Catholic and then Temple, DeFelice exhibited his athletic panache in baseball and football.
“Baseball was my better sport,” he said, revealing that the Cincinnati Reds had interest in signing him to a minor league contract as a catcher.
One of the problems with joining the Ohio-based team was that future Hall of Famer Johnny Bench was about to join the squad. Bench would lead The Big Red Machine to World Series victories in’ 75 and ’76.
“I wasn’t ready for that opportunity, but I have no regrets,” the 2005 Public League Football Coach of the Year said.
Settling into his life at Bok proved easy for DeFelice, who holds that educating and coaching revolve around corralling a young person’s interest.
“I set high standards for myself, my students and my players. I am always trying to maintain a positive tone of professionalism,”the now retired coach said.
When handling his gridiron troops, DeFelice looks for ways to channel their skills.
“I think all kids come to school with an equal dose of potential. We always evaluate players with that in mind.”
He encourages athletes to see themselves as entertainers bent on visualizing perfect execution of plays. He worries, however, that not enough student-athletes see sports as means for being competitive and crafting friendships.
“Sports contests are collections of thoughts, chess games, so to speak, but they should also be opportunities for developing camaraderie and finding direction,”he said.
In his retirement, DeFelice hopes to become a voice for inner-city children who receive negative influences. He has considered the Phillies and Eagles as aides in starting a community outreach program.
As he has aged, DeFelice has realized patience is a must in forming new thoughts and behaviors. He sums up his beliefs with the mantra “Change is a process, not an event.”
In October, he notified his players of the change next season will bring. The announcement, it seems, inspired the Wildcats, who posted an 8-3 record that included three shutout wins.
They advanced to the District 12 Class AA state subregional final Nov. 20, where, perhaps fittingly, they met West Catholic for the third straight year. Their 34-6 loss left the coach reflective.
“I have such pride in my guys,” DeFelice, who plans to attend games next season, said.
As for his most memorable win, he chose a ’99 Public League semifinal victory over Frankford. The 30-22 triumph gave the team a spot in the championship game, which it dropped to Germantown.
“That Frankford win brought new life to the school,” he said beaming.
As for devoting two-thirds of his life to Bok, DeFelice seeks simple rewards.
“For my players and students, I hope I have left an imprint on their hearts.”
Contact Staff Writer Joseph Myers at jmyers@southphillyreview.com or ext. 124.
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