On a day in May for 12 years, Coopertown School has been holding Grandfriend’s Day. With two grandchildren there, this year it was our turn to attend. A word about the term "grandfriend": It’s not an example of annoying political correctness. Not every child has a grandparent who is well enough or close enough to attend. For some, their grandparents may have passed away. So in order not to leave any child out, the school asks some students with two grandparents in attendance to share one with such a child. My wife became the grandfriend to a little Chinese girl named Sheri.
Our grandchild, Grayson, came out with Sheri and they escorted us to a room where we munched on goodies and sipped lemonade while Grayson and Sheri showed us their folder for Grandfriend’s Day. Grayson had read some books about grandparents and rated them one to four stars. He gave one book two because "it was only eight pages long." Things sure have changed; In my day, the shorter the book, the higher the rating.
One of the books Grayson showed me was written a l� Dr. Seuss in rhymes. It depicted a grandfather who liked to reminisce about his glory days in World War II. My "glory days" were achieved about 20 years later as an Air Force Reservist when I put too many suds in the washing machine and flooded the basement of our barracks not once, but twice. Ah, the good old days. I didn’t mention that episode to my grandson. Better he think I was helping Gen. George Patton become a hero in the Battle of the Bulge.
Meanwhile, my wife was learning about her new little friend Sheri. Her grandmother still lived in China. My wife offered the opinion that she and Sheri had something in common: They both had visited China — she on a 10-day tour and Sheri happened to be born there. I told my wife that meant she also had something in common with Mao Tse-tung.
Phase two of Grandfriend’s Day led us to the auditorium for a group singalong. The teacher who led us in song mentioned they had chosen tunes familiar to us grandfriends, presumably part of our youth. When we began to sing "On a Bicycle Built For Two," I wondered just how old they thought we were. Nevertheless, even singing "She’ll Be Comin’ ‘Round the Mountain" was fun with Grayson and Sheri.
Afterward, the children escorted us to their classroom for phase three. The children were called upon to introduce their grandfriends and tell the class something about them. One child’s grandparents were from Ecuador and visiting the States for the first time. They spoke and their son translated. My wife’s eyes began to fill with tears even before the translation. "How do you know they’re just not complaining about the traffic?" I asked her. It turned out they were thanking the school for their hospitality and said, while they enjoyed it here, after a month, they were already homesick. My wife cried again, but more briefly this time.
Another child’s grandparents were from Poland. Although they had been here for years, I hoped my wife could find another tissue. The classroom was pretty diverse, especially for a suburban school. One black child had a Sicilian grandmother. Another grandfriend told how, back in the day, the school punished her for being left-handed. I am left-handed so I identified with that one.
Finally it was Grayson’s turn to introduce me. I may be biased but I think he was so good that, if he shaved his head, he could replace Howie Mandel as a quiz-show host. I was asked to share a memory with the class from my childhood. I thought about telling the one where I peeked through the bathroom window one time and saw the shapely housekeeper next door taking a bath, but I thought better of it. So I mentioned the time I won 26 half-gallons of ice cream in a Sealtest contest. Each Sunday, I would visit my grandmother and we would devour one all by ourselves. It was supposed to be a year’s supply. It lasted three months. My grandmother liked to eat. The night before she died, she ate a pound of spaghetti and six doughnuts from Frangelli’s Bakery. I left that part out.
After it was all over, Sheri whispered to my wife her presence had made this a very special day. "And you’re a sweet lady," she said. Grayson hugged me.
Being a grandfriend does have its advantages.
